Useless Machine 
The Useless Machine serves absolutely no function beyond lording over a bank of switches and immediately turning off whatever switch you turn on. It's like having a sociopathic roommate without the trouble of having to put out an ad in Craigslist.
[John E, Cracked.com]
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Whoever invented it should call it "The Wife"
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByKalazam (560.60) 
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@Kalazam
Classic! 10 points for you
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByClearMud (285.20) 
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@Kalazam
You seems happy in marriage:)
Posted Dec-22-2012 Byfuckedupcanadian (18.30) 
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@Kalazam
Nah My wife only knows how to turn lights on.
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByCaketaker42 (37.80) 
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@Caketaker42 hah nice dp picture!
Posted Dec-22-2012 Bymannatera (0.60) 
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@Kalazam True. Every time I get turned on my wife has a way of shutting that whole thing down.
Posted Dec-22-2012 Bytheblue8 (7442.24) theblue8 View Channel Send Message
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reminds me of government lol
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByBIGLOUBRUNO (1933.70) 
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@BIGLOUBRUNO Much truth to that my good man!
Posted Dec-22-2012 Byaussite (1796.30) 
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@BIGLOUBRUNO Maybe yours. Out government would have two arms, one of them constantly picking money from the operator's pocket.
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByMarbus (489.30) 
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@BIGLOUBRUNO
Except we have the two party system. So you'd have to add the same machine on the other side with the switches in the middle and the two could just negate each other nonstop.
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByFrood (1.00) Frood View Channel Send Message
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@Marbus
Our government does have the 2 arms thing, but we're sure we also feel something stuck deep up our asses.
Posted Dec-23-2012 Bybeppelupo (22.30) 
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@beppelupo that my friend might be Berlusconi or Rubi
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByBCAA (287.20) 
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About as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.
Posted Dec-22-2012 Bysexysuzie (204.40) 
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@sexysuzie
Clever!
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByObba41 (374.36) 
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@sexysuzie
Nice joke. I'm sure it would make Ernst Kaltenbrunner piss his pants.
Posted Dec-23-2012 Bybeppelupo (22.30) 
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It's like my crazy wife who follows me around and does the exact opposite things I do
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByHelp X 14 (17.80) 
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(9)
my ex wife
Posted Dec-23-2012 Byjohnestel (92.44) 
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@johnestel
Comment of the day.
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByNorts (278.44) 
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put the apple logo on it, andddd profit
Posted Dec-22-2012 Bykidstroller (16.30) 
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(5)
stop provoking it!
Posted Dec-22-2012 Byufoools (70.20) 
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Toys for OCD people, perfect.
Posted Dec-22-2012 ByTB-303 (185.50) 
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(4)
that machine's a fucken asshole
Posted Dec-22-2012 Byziola (63.20) 
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(4)
Reminds me of my ex-wife.
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByMilitant Saganist (28.50) Militant Saganist View Channel Send Message
(4)
Looks like an analogy of any given argument with my wife...
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByHuskyTrail2019 (205.30) 
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@HuskyTrail2019 lol
Posted Dec-23-2012 Bylarryparamedic (683.60) 
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(1)
That would entertain me for hours.
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByTheGasMaskGuy (36.40) 
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give that to someone with really bad OCD. They'd self destruct.
Posted Dec-22-2012 Bykachin (175.94) kachin View Channel Send Message
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this video represents my life
Posted Dec-23-2012 ByFlemy (83.80) 
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@Flemy lo,l same here
Posted Dec-23-2012 Bylarryparamedic (683.60) 
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