April 20th, 2010
Arbitration Fabrication Press, Inc.
Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement.
The unrest began last Tuesday when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25% this April, from 72 to only 54. The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.
The suicide bombers' union, the British Organization of Occupational Martyrs (or B.O.O.M.) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to its members and immediately balloted for strike action.
General Secretary Abdullah Amir told the press, "Our members a
Tags: Suicide Bombers' Union, SBU, Arbitration Fabrication Press, AFP, Strike, Why am I typing these stupid useless tags on a silly yet poignantly humorous contrast of cultures and woe thereof? They are but ticklish to whom gentler dwells within.
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