In Australia, the New South Wales Roads and Transportation Authority wants young male drivers, probably the most reckless demographic behind the wheel worldwide, to slow down. So the organization has come out with an ingenious plan: Convince men that if they speed, women -- even elderly ones -- will assume they have undersized genitals.

Safety issues aside, the ancillary lesson, I guess, is this: If you want to get some action, putter around at 5 miles an hour in a Yugo, or maybe on a moped. I knew when I started blasting around in a souped-up, fire-engine-red sewage truck at savagely high speeds that I was probably not doing myself any favors, but didn't realize I would be hitting myself below the belt.